Generic Blues Lyrics & Chords By "weird Al" Yankovic

I woke up this morning
Then I went back to bed
Said I woke up this morning
Then I went right back to bed
Got a funny kind of feelin', like I got broken glass in my underwear
And a herd of wild pigs is tryin' to chew off my head
You know what I'm sayin'?

Well, I ain't got no money
I'm just walkin' down the road
Said I ain't got no money, honey
So I'm just walkin' down this lonely ol' road
Well, I wish I could get me some money
But I forgot my automated teller code

I was born in a paper sack
In the bottom of a sewer
I had to eat dirt clods for breakfast
My family was so poor
My daddy was a waitress
My mama sold bathroom tile
My brothers and sisters all hated me
'Cause I was an only child
I got the blues so bad
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe I'll blow my brains out, mama
Or maybe I'll, yeah maybe I'll just go bowlin' instead

I'm just a no-good, scum-sucking, nose-picking, boot-licking, sniveling, grovelling worthless hunk of slime
Nothin' but a low-down beer-bellied, bone-headed, pigeon-toed, turkey-necked, weasel-faced worthless hunk of slime
I guess I've got a pretty low self-image, maybe it's a chemical imbalance or something
I should probably go and see a doctor about it when I've got the time

Aw, make it talk, son, make it talk
Okay, now make it shut up

Plagues and famine and pestilence
Always seem to get me down
I always feel so miserable
Whenever I'm around
I wish somebody would come along
And stick a pitchfork through my brain
I'd flush myself right down the toilet
But I'd just clog up the drain
I got the blues so bad
Kinda wish I was dead
Maybe I'll blow my brains out, mama
Or maybe I'll go bowling
Or I just might go bowling
Maybe I'll just rent some shoes and go bowling
Maybe I'll join a league, enter a tournament, put on a stupid-lookin' shirt and go bowling...
Instead