Hallelujah Lyrics & Chords By Amateur Transplants

I'll sing about my favourite spice
It's pretty hot but its very nice
and the punch line's in the chorus
So I won't spoil it
I recommend you understand
That boys should always wash their hands
Between eating it and going to the toilet

Jalapeno, Jalapeno,
Jalapeno, Jalapeno.


I'll tell you about a person, who
Was pretty good in X-Men 2
And you'll guess this
Now that you have had some practice
She wasn't really known at all
Until she starred in Monster's Ball
For which she won an Oscar for Best Actress.

Halle Berry, Halle Berry,
Halle Berry, Halle Berry.


If you went back a century
And suffered some great injury
That meant you had to have an amputation
You'd suffer pain but not today
Cause now we have a clever way
So you can sleep right through your operation.

Anesthesia, anesthesia,
Anesthesia, anesthesia.


This is a phrase that people say
But only on one special day
You've said it many times, you will remember
You'll drink a large glass of malt wine
And sing a verse of Auld Lang Syne
And say this as you wave bye to December.

Happy New Year, Happy New Year,
Happy New Year, Happy New Year.


It's time to have another try
This one is a medical di-
Agnosis when one doesn't smell of roses.
Cause every time you yawn or speak
The flowers die and the people shriek
And everybody's hands rush to their noses.

Halitosis, halitosis,
Halitosis, halitosis.


Let's talk about a type of shop
Where you can never buy a chop
Or sausages or any kind of bacon.
Or crackling, or pork, or gammon
Or what the Spanish know as "jamon".
If you disagree, than you are quite mistaken.

Halal butcher, halal butcher,
Halal butcher, halal butcher.


That last punch line was quite obscure
But you will guess this one, I'm sure
Cause not to work it out would be quite shocking
It won't take that much thought at all
This phrase is something nautical
That prostitutes might say at time of docking.

Hello sailor, hello sailor,
Hello sailor, hello sailor.


A recent holiday I had, was fifty miles from Baghdad
A cultural and sunny destination.
It's not a trip I much enjoyed
Because my hotel was destroyed
By the U.S. army's occupation.

In Fallujah, in Fallujah,
In Fallujah, in Fallujah.


Some men notice with dismay
Their hair has fallen out one day
From problems with their scalp or malnutrition.
I'll tell you what this illness's called
It's more than simply going bald,
The proper name for this hair loss condition:

Alopecia, alopecia,
Alopecia, alopecia.


When takin' baths all through my life
I've cleaned myself with this device
It's made out of two metals in a mixture.
I'm not sure if it's copper and tin
Or maybe it has nickel in
But either way, I think you've got the picture.

Alloy loofah, alloy loofah,
Alloy loofah, alloy loofah.


There have been people through the years,
Who've had not one but two careers
Like this man here whose job needs explanation.
He's someone who's been double-trained,
A barrister, who's been ordained
Essential for religious litigation.

Holy lawyer, holy lawyer
Holy lawyer, holy lawyer.


I'll tell you about a type of sweet
I hope you never have to eat.
It's chewy and it's made with nuts and honey.
Alarmingly, it's full of cheese,
A salty cheese that comes from Greece,
It's not a taste, forgotten in a hurry.

Halloumi nougat, halloumi nougat,
Halloumi nougat, halloumi nougat.