Is Wrestling Fixed? Lyrics & Chords By Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine

The ambulance sirens rang
as they wheeled her to the stand
feathered, tarred, and handcuffed
to a stretcher
The doctor's diagnosis
was multiple sclerosis
an open and shut hopeless
fucking case

The wheels of Justice turned
till the tires were bald and burned
and when they'd all adjourned
I asked myself
am I un H A P P Y?
Does a newborn baby cry?
Did Elvis really die?
And I said to myself
Self... Is wrestling fixed?

Am I un H A P P Y
Does a newborn baby cry?
Did Little Red Riding wear a hood?
Do the three bears shit in the woods?
Was Humpty Dumpty fat?
Does the Pope wear a funny hat?
Is wrestling fixed?