Professional Pirate Lyrics & Chords By The Muppets

Long John:
When I was just a lad looking for my true vocation
My father said "Now, son, this choice deserves deliberation
Though you could be a doctor or perhaps a financier
My boy, why not consider a more challenging career?"

Pirates:
Hey, ho, ho
You'll cruise to foreign shores (Long John: Ha ha ha! Sing it, lads!)
And you'll keep your mind and body sound (Long John: Show him you've been practicing!)
By working out of doors

Long John:
True friendship and adventure are what we can't live without

All:
And when you're a professional pirate

Bad Polly:
That's what the job's about

Long John:
Upstage, lads, this is my only number!

Now, take Sir Francis Drake; the Spanish all despise him
But to the British he's a hero and they idolize him
It's how you look at buccaneers that makes them bad or good
And I see us as members of a noble brotherhood!

Pirates:
Hey, ho, ho (Long John: Oh, I love it!)
We're honorable men (Long John: 'Tis poetry in motion!)
And before we lose our tempers we will always count to ten!

Long John:
On occasion there may be someone you have to execute

All:
But when you're a professional pirate

Clueless Morgan:
You don't have to wear a suit
...What?

Mad Monty:
I could have been a surgeon
I like taking things apart!

Bad Polly:
I could have been a lawyer
But I just had too much heart

Clueless Morgan:
I could have been in politics
'Cause I've always been a big spender

Black-Eyed Pete:
And me...I could have been a contender

Long John:
Some say that pirates steal and should be feared and hated
I say we're victims of bad press; it's all exaggerated
We'd never stab you in the back, we'd never lie or cheat
We're just about the nicest guys you'd ever want to meet!

All:
Hey, ho, ho
It's one for all for one
And we'll share-and-share-alike with you and love you like a son
We're gentlemen of fortune and that's what we're proud to be
And when you're a professional pirate

Long John:
You'll be honest, brave, and free
The soul of decency
You'll be loyal and fair and on the square
And most importantly—

All:
When you're a professional pirate
You're always in the best of company!