Lecturer Lyrics & Chords By Kevin Eldon

I'm feeling very poorly, poorly in my belly But I promised to attend the fancy dress party Before I don my outfit I go and have a big shit Which is very runny and very, very...read more

Carol's really beautiful and very good at sums I'd like to put my willy in her nuni or her bum She always gets the number's right, she's got me into maths I'll...read more

A shotgun made it wield Sheep grazing in a field They pointed the gun at his head And made him take a sheep to bed This was quite absurd He'd never had a bird His screaming...read more

I met this girl on Myspace She was 16 and a half She said that I was well buff And that I made her laugh So I sent her a picture Of me wanking in the bath I think I misjudged...read more

I've been thinking about just one thing Since Christmas time last year When I got off with you at the Christmas do After eight pints of beer You must have been the worst for...read more